I am 32yrs old and a mother of a 14 month old boy. My story starts in 2007 (I guess I was able to handle myself mostly prior to that). I got married in May 2007 (second marriage; my first ended after a year of marriage). I was always doing long hours at work (14-17 hrs) and since this was one of the reasons that led to my first marraige breaking up, I decided to ease up a bit on the work front and switched to a regular 9 hour work day just before I got married the second time. Just about when I settled into marriage and my new job, I started experiencing various scattered physical symptoms such as neck and shoulder ache, chest ache, achiness or tingling in arms, anxiety etc. The aches and pains were all never severe but I started getting really worried that something was wrong with me. I believe I've even had a panic attack or two. I would always feel that something serious was wrong with me. Various GPs said all was well and then a neuro-spinal specialist did two x-rays and said that i had early spondylosis and I felt relieved since I at least knew what was going on. At this point I also tested high for blood cholesterol (total 262). A month later, I conceived, quit my job and the pregnancy flew by with occasional mood swings, depressions, anxiety etc. I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes towards the end of the pregnancy and this eventually led to an early delivery (c-section) of my baby. The first 3 months post partum were busy and exhausting. However soon I started feeling the same symptoms that I felt a year earlier - neck and shoulder would hurt, head would hurt in different places on different days, hands would pain, I would feel lightheaded, ear would hurt, I would experience facial pain - like before but none of the symptoms were severe but they were there for sure. This time around I visited a GP, a neurologist, an ENT specialist and they all said that I was ok physically but I may have Post Partum Depression. The neurologist even prescribed 9 months worth of medication but I ran away scared of anti-depressants. Have been managing since then sometimes scared when I get these symptoms, sometimes able to handle myself. Since the last 2-3 months along with all the afore-mentioned symptoms I have started experiencing some back pain too, along with that my hands ache with carrying the slightest weight, I get pins and needles in my hands more frequently. I have also observed that a lot of times when I am feeling these vague symptoms I feel relieved if I pass motion. I have also just found out that I am pregnant again. I am fed up with worrying about my health and cry often. I feel overwhelmed and like its all too much for me to take. What is wrong with me? Is it physical, mental or both? Is this PPD? Is this Panic, anxiety or something serious? Please help me. This often affects my relationship with my husband as he is unable to understand what happens to me periodically. Please help.
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